I'm Not A Diode

There’s only one thing you should know.

Aravind Jose T. — Sat, 05 Mar 2011 16:22:54 +0000

I tried so hard and got so far.
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.

I wish it was all just not real.

Aravind Jose T. — Sat, 04 Dec 2010 16:36:16 +0000

But it is. It is fucking real and it deeply hurts. The more you try to stand up, the more you get pulled down. I know this sound like ‘emo’ talk. At this point of things, I don’t even mind being called one. As a matter of fact, I just don’t give a fucking damn to anything anyone has to say. I’ve paid much attention and respect and anyone and everyone and always received shit in return. This time, I’m atleast gonna swear it. TO HELL WITH ALL.

I wish it was all just a dream and I could wake up and find out none of the scary things that really happened. But I hardly think it will be possible. It was a day that thrashes the basics. Throws you in confusion with a vengeance. Raises the middle finger in ultra slow motion. And puts you in shitload of heartbreak, fatigue and all sorts of shit. No, I’m not frickin’ talkin’ of any fuckin’ breakup.

This is goddamn real. I’m not even sure as to whether I will be able to type and complete this or my laptop will be go kaput by now. Because, you know, every fucking thing wants to mess with me.

Because I can see the end.

Aravind Jose T. — Sun, 27 Sep 2009 14:29:52 +0000

I face this problem of “being unable to explain or document some things/situation because I can see how it will be sorted out.”

i.e. I can see how the problem I was about to describe will be solved. And thus doesn’t feel like describing the process.

What am I saying this now.
Because I was about to write a blog post, involving a very futurustic idea of every new born getting his real identity (that’s his/her identity on web), right after they are born.
And was about to point out that the current rules require you to be specific years old to use those services, which restricts kids from having them.

But then I saw the end.
That will change. Those rules will be replaced by the required type of rules, once the world gets transformed and we all becomes the part of the big big one web.

For the lack of a better word

Aravind Jose T. — Sun, 27 Sep 2009 09:22:09 +0000

…I will call it destiny.
Yes, destiny.

Destiny is awesome. There is nothing more intriguing and enchanting than looking back at things that happened and see the miraculous interconnection each of the single thing had to one another.

While some consider this as a mere philosophy, they are surely missing out on something big that’ll transform your life to an awesomer one.

I’m not saying that your actions wont affect the outcome and your life, but that, you will act, only if that leads to destiny.

Now how to know when to act and when not to.
How to know whether someting will take you to destiny.
Simple — Keep going. Whatever you do in the course, will be done because it has to be done.

And now the classic question, my dear friend.
What’s my destiny?
Ah, boy. you dont want to ruin the surprise, right ?

The journey to the end accounts more than the end. Some say. Yeah, a good one, that is.

And I know, in the end, it’s all gonna be a hell of awesomeness, so intense that you can’t be evil. Word.

I tend to open up when I’m low

Aravind Jose T. — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 15:05:40 +0000

This is interesting. I wrote almost all of the posts (except some notable ones) here, when I felt low and pissed off.

Maybe, this is how things work. At least for the ones who are single.
When you’re happy you do random things you love.
When you’re low, you come to this dim lit dungeon, and put out everything.

This cycle was later named Universal cycle of insaneness.
Just kidding.

Where to get some more friends ?

Aravind Jose T. — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 15:03:20 +0000

I’ve got some really great souls around who knows me.
But then, there are many more around who’ve got the name-tag “good friend” but fails to get inside.

I mean, when I talk to them, I just say that I’ve been feeling awesome all through the days. And they turn their back saying “lucky you”.

Oh comon. I dint really mean it. I mean it was my way of telling you that inside I am not happy and I want you to find it.

But damn. They shut the door and left.

Sigh.
These burgers are delicious.

Feeling so awesome

Aravind Jose T. — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 15:52:26 +0000

Overflowing with awesomeness.
Hope my body doesn’t crash due to the overload.

Cant think about sleeping.
Everything is very awesome.

Back again. This time, motivated by @nobia_parker

Aravind Jose T. — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 12:05:05 +0000

Been away for a while. Coz I was feeling awesome for a long time (i still do). And I sorta considered this blog to be full of things I write when I feel low.

But then, I came across this girl, (twitter.com/)@nobia_parker and her blog Tomato, Tomatoo (http://www.purplestilletos.blogspot.com/) and am motivated to share the awesomeness too.

But then, I keep a posterous.
For what ? What will I write there ? Okay, we’ll get to it later.
Now about Tomato, Tomatoo.

I gone through it today. Infact read, about 10 or more posts and all of them were awesomeness.

Commented at many places there. Loved doing it.
She’s awesome with her writing.

You can udnerstand how awesome she is, by seeing me returning with a post after so looong

Later.

Sometimes I feel.

Aravind Jose T. — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 15:28:32 +0000

Sometimes I feel, I shouldn’t be doing all what I’m doing because it kind of puts me pressure on me. I feel like I want to live off hand, enjoying everything and not worried about anything. I feel that I’m not living that way now, and that I am worried about many things to be done/completed.

Me takes a deep breath. Takes a couple more.

Feels good. I realize that everyone who does good things feel this way, that they’re too exhausted and aren’t sure about the way they are heading. It’s perfectly normal.

I am free. I am spirited. These are just some stupid and testing stuff of the world. Who cares.

WHO THE HELL NEED TO CARE WHEN YOU KNOW THAT THINGS ARE GOING TO BE AWESOME IN THE END.

May 20 2009 was eventful indeed

Aravind Jose T. — Wed, 20 May 2009 16:18:54 +0000

Today was kinda big deal. My XII class results were published and I did well (at least for me, it is).
YAY!

Many of my friends did exceptionally well too.

It was the second day at the driving school and drove the car on the public road filled with state transport busses.
YAY!

KKR won the second match in a row. The victory is a double header as it cleared all obstacles for the Rajastan Royals, their way out of IPL2
YAYY !

But I’ve got to share something that’s really unfortunate. One of my friend who got 88% in the exams. And her MOTHER WAS SCREAMING AT HER ASKING “what the hell are you gonna do with this ?!!!”.
Seriously, isn’t this WTFedness ?
What the hell are they thinking ! I feel sorry for her. Have called her and have talked for some good time. She feels better now.

Another relative of mine. She was sent to a so-called entrance-cum-plus two coaching centre for the past two years, WHICH IS A HELL as all who know the place know it.
And it turns out that she got (only) 70%. While she and her family is sad about this (even me), I’m happy that she wrote and got passed in all the exams at least. (coz, surviving two years at that place is INSANE.)

Maybe, people will soon realise marks and stuff aren’t what counts and that you don’t have to be a topper or ABOVE others to get a good life.

Maybe, I can prove it being an example.
Wish me luck.

Update: It’s R.A.I.N.I.N.G heavily here. Holy bliss !
I feel romantic